Simplicity

Seeing all the disasters now afflicting the world, our Nice Friend Roel aka Rully comforts us with some comic relief.

BOSS DAN PELAMAR

Boss : Nama saudara siapa?

Pelamar : Prawojo, pak.

Boss : Coba ceritakan tentang keluarga saudara!

Pelamar : Saya dua bersaudara, adik saya masih kuliah
  di Jogya.  Orang tua saya tinggal di Surabaya.
Kakek dan nenek dari Bapak tinggal di Solo.  Kakek
  dan nenek dari Ibu tinggal di Semarang. Paman dan
  Pakde semua tinggal di Tegal.

Boss : Apakah saudara dapat berbahasa Inggris?

Pelamar : Yes, sir."

Boss : "Now tell me about your family in English!

Pelamar : "Sorry, sir.  I don’t have family in
  English.  They’re all living in Indonesia."

TEACHER AND STUDENT (1)

Teacher : Where were you born?

Student : Singapore, sir.

Teacher : Which part?

Student : All of me, sir.

TEACHER AND STUDENT (2)

A teacher was asking her class: "What is the
difference between ‘unlawful’ and ‘illegal’ ?"

Only one hand shot up.

"Ok, answer, Joan," said the teacher.

"’Unlawful’ is when you do something the law doesn’t
allow and ‘ill-egal’ is a sick eagle, sir."

NUBRUK BULE

Seorang cewek yang bahasa Inggrisnya kacau-balau
suatu hari nubruk seorang bule ketika jalan-jalan di mall.

Cewek : I’m sorry.

Bule : I’m sorry, too.
Si cewek bingung. Doi ngerasa harus ngejawab tuh bule.

Cewek : I’m sorry, three.

Bule : What are you sorry for?

Cewek : I’m sorry, five.

PERPUSTAKAAN

Di tengah malam, telepon di rumah seorang petugas
perpustakaan bernama Bobi berdering.

"Selamat malam. Maaf mau tanya, perpustakaan buka jam berapa ya?" tanya suara seorang lelaki di telepon.

"Ya ampun, Anda menelepon tengah malam begini
hanya ingin tahu kapan perpustakaan buka?" tanya Bobi.

"Tapi ini sangat penting", kata penelepon.

"Jam sembilan pagi", kata Bobi.

"Jam sembilan? Tidak bisa lebih pagi lagi?" tanya si penelepon.

"Memangnya kenapa Anda ingin datang pagi-pagi?"  tanya Bobi.

"Siapa bilang saya ingin datang? Saya ingin keluar dari perpustakaan ini."

It’s happening again.  Just like every online initiative I’ve ever undertaken.  Indonesians are running away with the Friendster Project.  You remember it, right?  It’s all explained at  http://groups.yahoo.com/group/indonesian-studies/message/4831 — this is the blog that goes with it.  The project is mainly about putting knowledge workers (nowo, also sometimes called researchers) on Indonesia in touch with each other in a more personal setting than interactive websites or lists.  Indonesian nowos in touch with other Indonesian nowos.  Non-Indonesian (Western and Asian) nowos in touch with Indonesian nowos.  And so on.  Why this early pattern in the project?  More Indonesian nowos here than non-Indonesian nowos.  A whole lot more.  The non-Indonesian nowos think all Friendster networks are just dating circles.  And they think all Friendsters are very, very young.  Too young.  Another stereotype.  Last, non-Indonesian nowos don’t like to put pictures in Friendster profiles.  Now I don’t believe the non-Indonesian nowos are inherently incapable of grasping what our Friendster Project is all about.  Well, I admit sometimes I think that.  So, to the majority group here at the moment, Indonesians, I humbly beg for your help.  Know a non-Indonesian nowo?  Persuade one or two to join the project.  If they’re techologically challenged, tell them how easy it is to join and then add me as a friend (to get into this project’s network).  Offer an oleh-oleh.  Of course, no high-cost economy tricks.  Drag them by their hair if necessary.  We all need each other in this very nice place.  So.  Help! Help!

Once upon a time it was very hard and very expensive to create a standalone website using your own domain.  You really had to be good at html (the common construction language of the web) yourself — or hand over a lot of money to someone who was.  Later, it became a little easier with menu-driven html editors.  That was when I entered the fray with my indopubs.com research site.  But one still had to know basic html concepts.  Making sites this way was still not a piece of cake.  And the programs cost money.  And were typically limited to certain platforms (mainly Windows). 

Now it’s a different era.  Using tools from Friendster, Blogger, or Multiply, you are in effect making a personal website.  Beginner-level options are free, but you usually don’t get a personal domain.  What you create has the the sponsoring services’ name (or that of its website building software) in the unique URL which  you tell others is the web address for your blog or website.  And you get little opportunity to play with html to do something the supplied software doesn’t do.  It’s nice, fairly easy, but sometimes too rigid.  Still, for many (maybe most) people, this is all great fun and more than enough.

There is another option.  You can register your own domain with a free or paid web hosting service (there are many, google ‘free web hosting’ and ‘paid web hosting’).  Those services may offer their preferred software for building webpages (Frontpage is still a common option).  But our diligent reference librarian friends who often create their own websites to educate us and communicate with each other keep their eyes open for free, open source, cross-platform website builders.  Recently they brought two such no-need-to-know-html programs to their readers’ attention.

One is called MySource, the other Nvu .  Their sites do a great promotion job and offer you the software for immediate download.  Though I have a web hosting account on which I could use either, I’ve not yet tried either, though indopubs.com could sure use some sprucing up (not to mention laborious updating).  But if the time isn’t yet there for me to try out this newest generation of website builders, perhaps it is for you.  So if you have always wanted to build a nice personal website but feared failure, maybe your time for just a dose of bravery has finally arrived.  MySource, Nvu — let me know how you make out.

Gorge W. Bush, President of the United States, has resigned, according to the websites of the New York Tomes, Washington Past, and Woe Street Journal.  Goggle’s news servers are so busy they have all crashed.

So far almost one hundred letters of congratulations from foreign leaders have poured into the What House.  A flash poll in 60 countries by the Galluping Organization showed that Bush’s popularity overseas has rebounded from all-time lows to new highs after word of his departure spread in seconds via the internet.

Vigilant TV crews filmed Bush and his wife waving goodbye to the cameras as they stepped into the official helicopter which would start them on yet another trip home to their ranch in Crawfish, Texas.  The few reporters present threw spitballs.

Natalie Main of the Dixie Clicks told Newswhack magazine, "Geez, it sure feels good.  God Almighty, we’re free at last.  It’s a great day for Texas."

Meanwhile, the government has been plunged into crisis.  Vice President Dick Cranky, who will succeed Bush, was rushed to an undisclosed location before he could take the oath of office.  Rumors of a coup by the Sacred Service are circulating everywhere.

Publicly, Bush gave no reasons for his action.  Nor, apparently, did he tell anyone on his staff.  The What House spinperson could not be reached.  His assistant said he had laryngitis.  The news of the Bush resignation was leaked by a foreign intelligence service believed to be JI.  CIA head Potter Gosh claimed he had been disinformed.

However, Lesley Stall of Over 60 Minutes, managed to reach the former President by cell phone for a brief conversation.  The Disassociated Press quoted a truncated version of her account which will air in full this evening on CeeBeeEs.

"It was remarkable.  The President said he was bipolar.  He called himself a great evildoer.  He confessed he had lied every day since law school.  He compared the war in Eyeraq to Veetnam and said it was another kwagmire.  He expected the current Eyeraq civil war to explode.  The country would disintegrate into three new states within days.  The Sadist resistance would restore Sad Hussein to power in the city of Baddag.  Zarki’s fighters would assassinate Sad while continuing to move their jaded operations into five neighboring countries.  At this point the President broke down and could not go on." 

As evening falls, over 200 million Americans are glued to their TVs for further developments.  Lights have gone on all over America. 

Yes, we have photos.  About 334 as of this moment.  Not of Indonesianists or indonesianis.  I bet Tempo’s word gladiators even use this awful, awkward, ridiculous-sounding word.  It might be nice to have some such people.  But IMHO, there aren’t any.  Indonesia is too complex.  Even great Indonesian scholars, pri, non-pri, whatever, can’t be this awesome thing, indonesianis.  Just too many fields to go around.  Fields of knowledge, academic and non, practical and non.  So what we have are 334 pictures (so far) of knowledge workers on Indonesia.  There, if you weren’t sure what you were doing all these years, you now have a splendid identity — knowledge worker. 

Where are these photos?  And how can you get to see them?  Pretty easy.  Easy, that is, so long as you are a formal member of indonesian-studies list.  Most of you reading this message already belong.   But if you just read the i-s postings on the web and never ever joined, or just get them via RSS feed, you’re in big trouble.  If you want to see the 334 photos, that is.  Yahoo only allows formal list members to see them.  Nothing I can do about that.  Now, if you are a formal i-s member, you’re on easy street.  Just go to the i-s homepage .  Look in the left column.  Find Photos among the listed offerings.  Click.  Then click on the album label, Researchers on Indonesia.  Then peer at the screen, and you’ll see Yahoo will let you look at what’s there in picture or namelist form.  In both formats, you can also choose just the page displayed, or find a ’show all’ link and click on it.  That’s a bit easier.  It’s convenient to bring up the list/showall screen, then print it for reference.  If you use the list/showall trick, Yahoo will let you view everyone in a slideshow (you control the speed).  If you look at everyone in one sitting, it’s a feature-length movie.  No kidding.  The photo collection is, of course, incomplete.  I just build it a little at a time.  But it remains useful for seeing the faces of people whose names you know but have never seen (even a few deceased persons, and, unfortunately, a few in jail).  It also shows the international diversity of Indonesian studies.  And its generational depth.  That’s impressive.  The field isn’t dying on a worldwide basis.  It’s growing.  Give thanks.  Now, enjoy the show.

Moving this little virtual adventure along a bit more today.  Nothing grand.  Just added a Nice Friends list in the left sidebar.  After all, a big aim of this project is to put people in touch with each other who might want to be in touch but never get around to finding each other.  The Nice Friends list is, of course, selective.  I intend to keep changing it.  So, hey, don’t feel too happy if your name is there, don’t feel too sad if your name is not there (yet).  For now, just click on a friend’s name.  This will take you to a personal profile.  Some limit access to their full profiles till you become Friendster friends.  But you’ll have enough info to message people using Friendster’s private email.  If you choose to message first before asking to be added as a friend, things get speeded up if you include the email address you use to sign in to Friendster.  Everybody here is very nice, so you have nothing to fear.  And the techies who wrote the invitations part of the software were very witty and shrewd types.  So, expect to get some nice replies from nice friends — eventually.  Some are quite busy, so give them time.  Ah, sometimes the software is also a little slow, so you got to be patient.  :-)  Meanwhile, you can listen to the Nice Songs I just put in the right sidebar.  They’re carefully hidden on my personal website.  :-D 

This is going to be a casual blog.  Informally and quickly written, short messages, more frequent postings than my two other blogs (see sidebar, please — thank you).  Hopefully, the entries here will be useful or entertaining or otherwise sticky.  But this blog will never rise to the heights of Loose Wire or DocuTicker.  Instead, you’ll eventually see these jewels and others as links in one of my sidebars as ‘Great Syndicated Sites’ or some such category.  Today I’ve just learned some of the basics here on Typepad (free Friendster version) and erected a skeleton.  So you may see some changes, even some novelties, depending on the vagaries of my life and existence.  I will try to keep you up-to-date from time to time on the state of the Friendster Project (this blog is a part of that effort) linked to indonesian-studies list.  I’ll try to use Simplicity and my Friendster network (you can join it directly from a link in one of the sidebars) as a sort of base camp (as Jeremy Wagstaff does so ably in Loose Wire) and outreach (as do the diligent maintainers of DocuTicker).  So, stay tuned.  Feel free eventually to link directly here if you wish.  You can also contact me about matters great and small through the email link in the sidebar, or through comments on entries.

Silences, screams, camaraderie, wondrous things, and a few tall tales.